When Love Takes a Backseat to Healing: KJ Opens Up About His Break From Dara

Sometimes the most loving thing a couple can do is step apart. That’s the unexpected lesson Summer House newbie KJ Dillard shared during a recent appearance on the More Life With Carl Radke podcast—and it’s a story that cuts through the typical reality TV relationship narrative.

KJ, 28, and costar Dara Levitan, 33, met during Summer House season 10 after being introduced by West Wilson and quickly became one of the show’s focal points. But behind the scenes, KJ was battling something far heavier than typical early-relationship jitters. After the show wrapped, he spiraled into a mental health crisis that led to hospitalization for self-harm. Following that hospitalization, he was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder—a diagnosis that shifted everything.

Here’s where the story gets real: Dara didn’t abandon him when things got dark. Instead, she made the harder choice. Recognizing that KJ needed space to heal, Dara ended their relationship so he could focus entirely on recovery without the weight of trying to maintain a partnership. It wasn’t a dramatic breakup; it was an act of compassion. KJ even credits costar Mia Calabrese with encouraging Dara to take this step. As he explained on the podcast, if they’d stayed together while he was in recovery, he would’ve been focused on saving the relationship instead of saving himself.“Recovery changed my life,”he said.

What makes this story refreshing in an era of Instagram-official relationships and social media performance is KJ’s willingness to acknowledge that sometimes love means letting go. He wasn’t in therapy at the time, was on only one medication, and had just discovered a major mental health diagnosis he hadn’t known about. He needed the space. And Dara gave it to him.

The two have since reconnected, and according to KJ, they’re stronger for it. He’s grateful to West for the introduction, even though the two men have since become distant. And he’s protective of what he and Dara have rebuilt—something forged not in the heat of new romance, but in the harder work of individual healing and mutual respect.“We both know what we want and what we’ve gone through together,”he said.“It’s honestly, some love story s*** that we’re not gonna let outside influence affect that.”

In a landscape where reality TV often celebrates chaos and drama, KJ’s openness about mental health struggles and the difficult decisions that come with them feels like a different kind of story—one where vulnerability wins.