When One Twin Becomes the Problem: A Marriage on the Brink

Twin babies should be a double blessing. But what happens when one parent decides one of them is simply too hard to love?

A woman recently turned to Reddit’s‘Girl Dinner Diaries’forum with a story that’s equal parts heartbreaking and infuriating. She and her wife welcomed twins over the summer—babies they’d both chosen to have together. At first, everything seemed fine. Then her spouse developed a clear favorite.

The“easier”twin got smiles, interaction, and warmth. The other one? That baby got angry glares, cold silence, and deliberate avoidance. When the harder twin cried—as babies do—the woman’s spouse would visibly bristle. The rejection was unmistakable, and it was poisoning the family dynamic.

The original poster tried everything to fix it. She spent extra time bonding with the easier twin so her wife could focus on building a connection with the harder one. She bent herself backward trying to smooth the situation. But nothing worked, and the effort was destroying her. In a moment of raw honesty, she admitted a thought that probably haunts her:“I should have ended the pregnancy. We chose this together.”

Finally, she drew a line. Either her wife gets serious about changing how she treats that baby, or the marriage is over. Her wife’s response? Anger, tears, and an accusation that the poster was abandoning her—”just like everyone else who leaves.”

That last detail is worth sitting with. A pattern of people leaving. Deep wounds around abandonment. Reddit users, including someone claiming to be a children’s therapist, recognized this immediately as either a major red flag or a sign that postpartum depression or psychosis might be at play. One commenter nailed it:“She clearly has no intention of working on herself if people leaving her has become a pattern.”The therapist chimed in with urgent advice: leave unless she turns it around right now. Another suggested getting her to a doctor immediately.

The hard truth here isn’t subtle. Whether this stems from unresolved trauma, untreated postpartum illness, or simply who her spouse has always been, one thing is clear: babies can’t fix broken adults. They can only be broken by them. Two innocent infants are watching their mother be rejected by one of her own parents. That’s the real crisis. And the Reddit poster—who’s already sacrificed her own wellbeing trying to solve a problem that isn’t hers to fix—may be the only adult in that house capable of protecting them.

No update has been shared yet about where things stand or whether professional help was sought.