Dating Expert Says Coffee Dates Signal Low Attraction and the Internet Is Not Having It

A TikTok dating expert known as The Date Doctor set off a full-blown debate this week after claiming that a man who is highly attracted to a woman would never suggest coffee for a first date. His reasoning? Men spend money on the people they value, and he’d be embarrassed to offer coffee to someone he’s trying to impress. The clip racked up 38,900 likes and over 2,500 comments, and the comment section split almost immediately.

Supporters of the take called coffee dates low effort and low interest, arguing that real attraction shows up as real effort. But a whole lot of people pushed back, pointing out that coffee is basically the interview: short, cheap, and perfect for figuring out whether there’s actual chemistry before committing to a three-hour dinner. Several women said they specifically prefer quick first dates because they’re easy to exit if things go sideways. Others shared stories of long-term relationships that started with coffee, and one couple’s first date was literally Burger King.

So where do you land? Is a coffee date a sign of low interest, or the smartest move in modern dating? Drop your take in the comments, and tell us about your cheapest first date that actually worked out.